Past Insecurities...

You know how we tend to give people advice but never take it? Yeah I was one of those.

For a few years in high school (we call it secondary school) I used to be quite insecure about myself because I was really skinny and I was a "late bloomer" as one may call it. So much so, that I had a crush on one of my closest friends at the time and NEVER told him a word, but of course my journal knew everything!

Fast forward to my last year in high school, in which I decided to have a boyfriend but I knew I wasn't ready for one at the time. Of course, I still had a bit of body image issues, but by that time the "late blooming" stage was already overcome, as I had a "figure" and some gluteus maximus action going on, if ya know what I mean. But for some reason, my then boyfriend asked me a question about my body that i'm not even comfortable saying on the internet. Needless to say that I laughed it off, but from that time, I was already turned off.

I don't think anyone I knew knew that I was uncomfortable in my own skin because I used to put up a front all the time. I have these brown eyes that capture people's attention all the time, which means they'd pay attention to me, which I sometimes didn't like. But I've learned to accept compliments and not be shy about it. Feeling insecure takes YEARS to get over (trust me, I know), if we ever do at all. I am still not 100% as comfortable as I would like to be, but i'm wayyy past how I used to feel in high school. I think i'm pretty happy with myself actually. I'm in a good place right now.

One of my goals by the end of summer is to have a body that I am completely and utterly satisfied with. I plan on doing stuff like juicing sometimes, working out more, try to be more outdoorsy (I could stay indoors for days), and just improve my overall mental and physical health.

I leave you with this song that has been in my head for DAYS now

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y6Sxv-sUYtM



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